Responding to Em..

My Dear Em,

Well this wont fit in the comment box so...…

Please forgive me for not responding to your comment sooner I wanted to give you the time you deserve and only respond after much prayer, and no, I do not mind a good devils advocate. Dialog is healthy espescially when we respect one another our boundaries and our differences. I was saddened to hear of your grandmother's death yet relieved that she is no longer in pain and that the burden your mother (and your whole family) has endured for so long has been lifted.

I too believe God's desire is for "Thy (His) will to be done on earth as it is in heaven" therefore, when people limit God by saying He only heals one certain way, or only in heaven, or that the miracles and gifts of biblical times no longer exist I remind them of that verse and a few others. I believe God's will in heaven according to His word is for total healing lack of stress and strife and the fulfillment of our lives with Him.

Therefore we should be able to experience a mirror of this in our world today shouldn't we? If Jesus is the same yesterday today and forever (as scripture states) I believe this would be true. It seams that our civilized culture has anesthetizes us from a truly Holy and Sacred experience with God. That experience began in the garden and continued throughout biblical history with the prophets and became full with the birth of the living Messiah.

I have become terribly frustrated at the lack of belief in our culture ~ I believe underdeveloped countries like Africa have something we in the west cannot seem to hold onto. The faith of believers in some villages is so strong that miracles occur daily allowing the lame walk, blind to see, deaf to hear and the dead are occasionally even raised! Since my mother and I have both experienced supernatural healings and I know many others that have as well, I suppose, it sounds lame for me to say this? Unfortunately, I know more people who have been consumed by disease then healed of it.

I personally believe our modern culture to be a huge inhibitor, we are so rational, so scientific, and heck God is the father of science and rational thinking so I am not saying its wrong just out of balance. I could bring up the other side of the coin my other big frustration, Christians throwing out their God given intellect by letting emotional experience rule them with absolutely no rational thought or ideas in sight!

Ok sorry for the rabbit trail (I do have a purpose- really;) getting back to the subject at hand I believe grief to be a healthy emotion I am not sure if it does or doesn't fit into the "On earth as it is in heaven" scripture because grief is a natural God given emotion we need to experience to be healthy. Have your read The Final Quest by Rick joiner ~ I highly recommend it! (Link above) I have never heard an eternal perspective of feelings emotions realities etc, so eloquently stated as in The Final Quest.

I want to clarify what I meant by grief in my journal entry about my Dad. I think of my father (and Jane ~ Jim's mom) almost daily (ok, daily :) I feel a significant place they filled in my life is missing. It does not mean God cannot fill this place here on earth, I believe He has. It means that I remember them, I notice there absence, I do not wallow in tears. Although, occasionally I am touched by a memory or reminded of them I think that its a healthy thing to do. So many people wont even talk about a loved one after their passing it's like they never existed. I want to honor the lives of those I have loved and now miss and there are many. I would like to point out again this does not mean despair just a noticeable absence.

I was reminded of the following passage in John.

John 11: 32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34"Where have you laid him?" he asked. "Come and see, Lord," they replied.35 Jesus wept.36 Then the Jews said, "See how he loved him!"

Did Jesus weep because of their unbelief, or did he weep because Mary and all the others were grieving and it hurt Him to see their pain? If Grief is a natural emotion just as love and anger are. We need to express these emotions, to cleanse ourselves emotionally, spiritually, and physicaly by dealing with them rather then suppressing them. The empty space left by a loved one's passing is always noticeable, but grief does change over time. The grief I felt upon my father's death and Jane's death is not the same today as it was initially. I hope I am making some sort of since to you.

I read someplace that scientist had discovered that when tears are released toxic chemicals are purged from the body. They also found that people who don't deal well with their emotions-those who suppress them have more chronic diseases. This is one of the key things dealt with in MEW the physiological (scientifically verified) responses in the body as a result of issues that have not been properly dealt with. This does in NO WAY mean I belive all illnesses are a result of lack of dealing with emotions and so on, genetic predisposition, enviornment and other factors can all come into play.

When we find the root (many emotional & spiritual) and address them, we are cleansed emotionally, spiritualy and physicaly as a response we give God authority in our life to bring healing, the symptoms and the disease is reversed and we are healed. I don't have answers, I dont have it all figured out in my life but I have been Endo and IBS symptom free for over a year and thank God daily. I know I have a long way to go more healing is coming as I allow God to pull off the layers and go deeper into my life.

MEW is great and my understandings of the theory behind the teachings do not do it justice besides it's not a formula it's not fool proof (Gods not into formulas from my point of view) there are many ways He chooses to heal and there is the obvious "a time to live and a time to die" that must be factored in. I don't believe that God has limits or expect Him to mold Himself to my beliefs (which is so noticeably a trend throughout history) most want a God but on our own terms. Few want to let Him be who He is, we want to make Him into something we are comfortable with, mold Him into our image our ways of thinking ~ not the reverse.

Ok, I know your asking what on earth does this rabbit trail have to do with Grief well if I suppress my feelings (which I have done most my life) and don't deal with my emotions and grief I may allow toxins to build up in my body that could cause disease. I am not saying we need to lose control of our emotions just that we need to find a safe and healthy way to express them. My failure to do this has literally caused me great pain and suffering. After much reflection over the last several years I see how I inadvertently caused my body and spirit more harm. I stuffed everything down about my dad's death for years along with other things then when I returned home I relived all the pain and then some and was faced with the realities of the effects of suppressing thise emotions.

Btw I am exited you may be going to the MEW conference it could change your life and bring you new freedom and understanding. I also want to point out that MEW focuses on many aspects blocks to healing the least of which is unresolved emotions.

Finely, I wanted to respond to your concerns about your grandmother's final destination. I was grieved for you when you expressed your hurt in not knowing if she had committed her heart to Christ. I too believe in hell I believe it is biblically the separation from Christ a choosing we make not God. As I see it from my weak understanding of scripture (and contrary to folk lore) nowhere in God's word does it indicate His desire for anyone to be separated from Him. The bible states repeatedly a message of love and unity that God through Christ desires with us.

I do not know if hell is a literal fiery eternity or not? it may NOT be a metaphor as so many belive but a real place where fire is eternal. For me the thought of being separate from The One who loves me, accepts me, and died for me grieves me far more then the thought of burning eternally. No matter what Hell truly is I do not think The Lover of our soul would want us to focus on that realm but on Him and the Love He has for ALL His children and the Grace He extends to everyone.

One thing I have learned is to not over analyze the salvation (relationship with God) of others. We are responsible for our own salvation and cannot judge another's soul. I believe this is especially important to remember when it involves a loved one. It will do us absolutely no good whatsoever to judge the heart of a loved one, we cannot truly know their hearts only God does. Who can know what another's relationship with God is truly like, who knows the last minutes of your grandmother's life or perhaps the quiet faith she had during her lifetime?

Well I think I am finished rambling, I just want to point out that even with all the above mentioned opinions I know nothing! I am on a quest same as you for truth, for understanding, for a life of completion with Christ. Hope this has made since and that I have not confused you further.

I pray all things said in this post that are absolute nonsense will drift away like sand and that anything valid will engrave itself on our hearts.

I am praying ~ miss you!